Having a Goal Makes All The Difference…

It’s been so long since my last entry, which was my first!!! I somehow got in a depressive mood, and I'm not so optimistic as I was since then. The pressure and stress of studying were building up, I hated everything that I was doing, I thought that I couldn't devote my life to something that I wasn’t crazy about. I could never imagine what I was going be doing in the future, I felt lost and out of place and whenever anyone asked me about my dream or ambition for the future, I could only say “I just want to be happy”. I could not think of anything else to say, I could not define the things that my happiness lies under.

A few weeks passed before vintage doc asked us to draw what we saw when we thought of medicine, and the first thing that came to mind was to color the paper black… that scared me!!! Two days later, my friends and I attended an ECG course that we’d been longing to attend. I woke up early in the morning, barely getting any sleep the night before. We decided to wear black pants instead of jeans and proper shoes instead of converse with the lab coats, in hope of being as "professional" as possible. We were the youngest there, and we arrived an hour before the course started. Obviously we were very excited about it!! The course was dull at first, but then it got very interesting as it progressed. We learned how to read normal ECGs and how to interpret changes in them. The lecturer started involving us more by asking questions, and was very interactive. Usually in lectures my concentration does not last for more than half an hour! This course lasted for six hours, without us getting tired!! It was amazing how we were able listen for that long without getting fed up. I was surprised that I enjoyed listening and learning, I couldn’t believe that I actually liked what I was doing…

When I went back home, I spent the rest of the day telling my family how impressive that course was, and how much I liked that field. What I learned in that course gave me hope, gave me a goal to aim at, and allowed me to dream of becoming a doctor (cardiac surgeon inshallah) for the first time in my life! And I’m willing to devote my life to it. So you guys, if I ever change my mind, please help me get back on track… Now, when I study, the only thing that keeps me going is thinking of that dream of mine. I think of becoming successful, and I believe (at least for now) that success is the only thing that’s gonna make me happy. And, if I were to draw something when I think of medicine now, I’d draw a heart!! To some of my friends this was just another course that wasted half of our weekend, but to me this course made me decide what I want to spend the rest of my life HAPPILY doing.

classy doc